From the folks who actually fix things.
I Came. I Saw. I Fixed It. I Invoiced It. — Tradesman Tee
I Measure Twice So You Don't Have to Call Me Twice — Tradesman Tee
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Adopted. Spoiled. In Charge. — Dog Lover Tee
Aged to Perfection. Loud as Hell. — Biker Tee
Bad Attitude! — Biker Tee